Waiting to trip up our relationship, if not destroy our marriages.It’s kind of like trying to hold a beach ball under water.
That way, when the next crisis hits, you can look at it as an opportunity to deepen your relationship, rather than going into that awful “Holy Shit, this is it–we’re finally getting divorced! When we’re ready, really ready–pushed by bad news, a death in the family, whatever it is that tips you over that edge–one day, we finally decide to just do it. So how about we help each other out here by building up an arsenal of tips to help us get through these yucky times?
This is what happened to us this past week, when we got the yucky news about our friend, which caused us to take a step back and reevaluate where we were and where we were going. 2.4.15 UPDATE: I love to hear from my readers, and I read every single email and comment you send me.
You can only do it so long–eventually, it’s going to pop right up out of the water, probably when you least expect it. I’ve been thinking a lot about resentment lately, and trying to figure out how to let it go.
Here’s what these all my impromptu interviews with strangers have taught me: 1) If you’re feeling resentful, try renegotiating with your spouse.
But when I don’t tell someone else about it, it continues to eat at me and eventually spurs me to action.
What does staying stuck in that resentment really accomplish, anyway?
“I love you and I’m not leaving you, “she said, “but this ring doesn’t represent what it should–our marriage isn’t a true union right now.” She felt peaceful about her decision, she said, and she didn’t do it to threaten her spouse–she did it because she’d decided it was time for her to let her husband know she wasn’t going to keep picking up all of the slack when it came to maintaining their marriage.
Now, I’m not in any way advocating that you do this yourself.
As other readers chime in, you’ll also get a wider range of advice.