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It was based on her personal experience – she’d been cheated upon, and even dated a polyamorist at a time.
As a result, I remember her telling me, point-blank, early in the relationship (and repeatedly thereafter): “If you ever cheat on me, you’d better tell me.
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I do not tolerate cheaters and I will break up with you.” And, me, ever the wise-ass, replied, with a twinkle in my eye, “Well, if you’d break up with me, why would I tell you that I cheated? ” And I’d reply: “Yeah, but what if I made a god-awful mistake – say, drunkenly kissing a stranger at a party in Vegas?
” And she’d reply: “Because it’s the right thing to do. What if I made a mistake that I instantly regretted and would never repeat?
You want a guy to tell you the truth about cheating? If she remains unsure for a long period of time let her know that you respect that and you will move on considering yourself single ( free ).
You better be prepared to forgive him and painfully accept his apology. To wrap up, I want to offer a quote from Ramana Hamarshi, “Wanting to reform the world without discovering one’s true self is like trying to cover the world with leather to avoid the pain of walking on stones and thorns. What is of important to you is being with her and her feelings.
It just doesn’t make any sense.” I’m not defending cheating.