It's when you think of dating as auditioning a potential soulmate that it becomes fraught with anxiety, unpleasantness, and emotional danger. I'm interested in learning what we do and don't have in common, and which of the divergences matter a lot.
Plus, the writer in me loves hearing people's stories, and first dates are a great way to learn a huge amount in an hour, because it's expected that we share our stories.
But if the baggage becomes apparent too early in the relationship, then a guy will probably bail.
Also, baggage causes people to put pressure on or damage a relationship, so it may be doomed from the outset. Commitment means that I've decided that the woman I'm settling down with is perfect and there is no one else out there for me.
It's nice to hear nothing but your lover's breath against the backdrop of the evening or early morning.
It's peaceful to lie in someone's arms in the dark with great music or even the low buzz of the TV (although that tends to distract me) in the background.
The best thing to do is to act like you have some experience, and not question anything.
I think back to the advice my dad once gave my sisters and me when he snuck us onto the "premium members only" tennis courts at this fancy resort at the beach.
We want to bail the morning after a one-night stand. I'm foul when I'm hung over, so I am sure others are too. Do everything you can to get home and fester in your own bed. Give each other a hug, wish each other well, don't say anything about calling, and don't believe him when he mutters that he will call you. There is no reason women wouldn't understand or know sports like guys do if they were as obsessed. That "up against the wall" variation is tougher than it sounds.
I just think guys across the board are more sports-obsessed than women are. The entire shower apparatus is so slippery, and then you have soap all over the place. Plus, I do my best to keep my bathroom clean, but I don't think I'd ever want to have sex anywhere near something called "mildew." think you're crazy sometimes, but only because it makes things easier for us.
Commitment means I've found my soul mate, that I am completely secure with myself, and that there should be no going back.
I don't know about you, but all of that is pretty heavy.
Alcohol should be introduced into the relationship slowly, but if a drink or two takes the edge off, and wine adds romance it's fine. But the one thing that should never happen is excessive application: too much, too many colors, or if it's just a botched attempt at a good makeup technique.