Technology and dating

The piece, by investigative journalist Nancy Jo Sales (best-known for her writing on the Bling Ring) opens on a savage vista: a Manhattan bar, where “everyone is drinking, peering into their screens and swiping on the faces of strangers they may have sex with later that evening”.A financial worker tells Sales he hopes to “rack up 100 girls” in bed per year, and has slept with five in the past eight days.At its base, technology is a revolution in logistics, not in psychology or sociology – it gives us better access to the things we already lust after; it doesn't change the nature of the lust itself.

This easiness, David Buss, a psychology professor, tells her, changes the nature of demand: When there is a surplus of women, or a perceived surplus of women, the whole mating system tends to shift towards short-term dating. My initial reaction while reading the opening lines of Sales’ piece was: “Well, it is Manhattan.” Sales’ two main groups of case studies are visitors to a bar in New York’s financial district and college students, neither of which have ever been known for their taste in mature, long-lasting relationships.

This raises the suspicion that dating apps' effect within these communities is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

So, in some ways, we're not as committed to being committed—and we may tend to focus on what could be better (or what's lacking) in our relationships rather than being grateful for what we have." title="" src="data:image/gif;base64, R0l GODlh AQABAIAAAAAAAP///y H5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" data-src="https://hips.hearstapps.com/cos.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/14/25/539fd131e68e2_-_cos-02-beautiful-woman-lookin-sad-with-boyfriend-de.jpg?

resize=768:*" /But, on the other hand, because it's so easy to find new people through technology, everyone, for better and worse, is more disposable than they used to be.

So, in some ways, we're not as committed to being committed—and we may tend to focus on what could be better (or what's lacking) in our relationships rather than being grateful for what we have.

blow job or the best way try new sex positions —a big win for our sex lives." title="" src="data:image/gif;base64, R0l GODlh AQABAIAAAAAAAP///y H5BAEAAAAALAAAAAABAAEAAAIBRAA7" data-src="https://hips.hearstapps.com/cos.h-cdn.co/assets/cm/14/25/539fd13215660_-_cos-03-sexy-woman-on-computer-de.jpg?Twine, a new dating app, will inevitably cause controversy at launch, because it allows daters to select openers from a pre-written list based on your match's interests ("Would you agree that George Michael is fab? "These apps have stripped us of our ability to converse! But if the app takes off, it'll be because icebreakers, and even sexual relationships light on conversation, are as old as humanity itself.Sales' piece really investigates hook-up culture, not dating apps, and her choice of apps as a root cause seems like a mix-up between causality and correlation.They act like all they want is to have sex with you and then they yell at you for not wanting to have a relationship. As with any other aspect of technology that has inserted itself into our daily life, it’s tempting to attribute social trends to the mode of dating, not the people doing it.How are you gonna feel romantic about a girl like that? But that’s giving technology too much credit: if people want a disposable dating culture, they’ll seek it out, with or without apps.we tend to overestimate the impact of technology on human behaviour; more often than not, it is human behaviour that drives technological changes and explains their success or failure.

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