And believe me, it wasn’t much better for the women I tried to date, either.
We come up with increasingly baroque reasons why we have been uniquely disadvantaged – we’re too “beta”, for example, for the notoriously “hypergamous” women.
The PUAHate forums that Elliot Rodger frequented take this to an almost fascinating extreme, comparing brow ridges and jaw angles and eye space in some sort of unified theory of sexual phrenology.
We blame others for somehow depriving us of sex, as though it were something we were owed.
We blame for whatever flaws make us perceive ourselves as unfuckable.
Because when we fail to follow the Standard Virginity Loss Narrative, the fault lies with .
Speaking of stories: I want to tell you the story about my first time. Not too far off from the average age of 17 actually, but even had I known, it wouldn’t have made me feel better at the time.
They talk about feeling broken or unworthy, that they’ve missed some sort of open time frame where they could lose their virginity and now they’re (metaphorically) screwed.
It feels like to 50 – that they can’t bring themselves to talk about it.
When you’re focused on your identity as Virgin with a capital V, it can feel like everybody else is at a party that you’ve been left out of, even as it’s going on all around you. Prom goes from just a dance to THE BIGGEST NIGHT OF YOUR LIFE, a night when you’re supposed to confess your love and slip away to lose your virginity.