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Others may be reminded of their spouse, or, more happily, an ex-spouse. (I would link you to my CV there to compare, but, you know what, I lost it. Even the hard ones.) And then his wife, Lidija Rangelovska, consented to be interviewed as well! Gaslighting is a pernicious form of stealth or ambient abuse.

Either way, we are all transfixed by the idea of narcissists, as is evidenced by their prevalence in the popular media. So, without further ado, I present the Narcissist and His Wife. You will note he was kind of openly annoyed with some of my questions, which is pretty funny in and of itself. What parts of your upbringing may have contributed to your narcissism in later life? The abuser is hidden from view and operates behind the scenes. I would like any pain and damage I inflict to be attributed to me and to inspire shock, awe, and fear in my victims and adversaries. A: I have been successful in various fields, but I would have been considerably more accomplished had I not been a self-defeating, misanthropic, and sadistic narcissist .

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Make sure you seek therapy for yourself if you recognize that you are overtly behaving like you like one child better.

It is likely that the unpreferred child is triggering unresolved issues from your own childhood and past.

Does he beat or slap you or otherwise mistreats you physically? In other words, they either generate their Narcissistic Supply by applying their bodies or by applying their minds .

Does he then switch to being saccharine and “loving”, apologizes profusely and buys you gifts? The somatic narcissist flaunts his sexual conquests, parades his possessions, exhibits his muscles, brags about his physical aesthetics, youthfulness, sexual prowess or exploits, and is often a health freak and a hypochondriac.

If you have answered “yes” to of the above – stay away! Somatic narcissists are often portrayed as sex addicts or histrionic.

But really they derive their narcissistic supply not so much from the sex act as from the process of securing it: the chase and conquest, then often discard their prey, having extracted the attention and admiration they had sought.

Does he disapprove if you are away for too long (for instance when you go to the bathroom)?

Does he act in a patronizing and condescending manner and criticize you often?

The source of the abuse or trauma is immaterial – the perpetrators could be parents, teachers, other adults, or peers. Unable to work in a team, to compromise, to give credit where due, and to strive towards long-term goals, the narcissist – skilled and gifted as he may be – finds himself unemployed and unemployable.

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