"It's hard to turn back once you start down the divorce road," says Newman.8. While a separation can give kids false hope of their parents reuniting or make the transition back to being a united family difficult, a trial period before divorce can convince you that splitting is best.
Pamela Williams Kelly, a lawyer in Memphis, TN, who separated from her abusive husband when her children were young, didn't realize how much her strained marriage had affected her six-year-old son until her separation.
But sometimes, taking the in-between step of separation before a full-on split could be the right move for you and your family. When one person wants a divorce, and the other wants to work on things, a separation could be a good option, says Jacqueline Newman, a partner at a law firm in New York City specializing in divorce.
"When I decided to divorce, it was because I didn't want to keep doing this over and over.
The main question I asked myself was, 'Would life without my husband be better?
"However, if your spouse's job is bonus driven, you may want to separate and not file for divorce." That way, you'd still be entitled to those assets.10. Another practicality to consider: how you'll be able to obtain health care if you're on your spouse's plan.
Since a separation means that, legally, you and your husband are still married and eligible for each other's medical insurance, avoid a full-on divorce if "one party has poor health, an expensive pre-existing health condition or current illness like cancer," Childs says.
The oldest known Valentine, dating back to 1415, was sent by Charles, Duke of Orleans to his wife while he was imprisoned in the Tower of London.
Celebrating Valentine's Day steadily gained in popularity through the 19th century—especially once the greeting-card industry was in full swing thanks to the Industrial Revolution's printing press and cheaper postage. Howland (known as "Mother of the Valentine") began selling the first mass-produced cards in America in the 1840s and Hallmark Cards entered the scene in 1913.
"Ask yourself: How could you have been healthier, more constructive and more mentally, spiritually and sexually aware and available? "If you don't get this down now, you'll experience similar issues in your next relationship."4. In some cases, a separation may be best if your morals or religion tell you divorce is a bad idea, says certified family law specialist Erin M. "With a legal separation, you divide up property, debts and assets, as well as deal with child custody, visitation and child and spousal support—the business end of a marriage—without dissolving the union," she says. She suggests asking yourself: "Is there verbal, physical or substance abuse? On the flip side, Kate, who divorced after a few separations, says that working with a pro might help you split without regret.
"My ex and I weren't ready to totally call it quits," she says.
"If you're experiencing repeat problems in each relationship than it may be . " While some issues—like poor communication and needing more affection—are fixable, others—like violence or emotional abuse—aren't.6. If your relationship issues are fixable, try marital therapy while you're separated, says Rosenberg.